Is Everyone Blogging Without Me? (And Other Concerns)

In a desperate attempt to rekindle my fizzling romance with writing, I decided to start a blog. (Okay, yes, I liked that line so much, I made it my blog description. So sue me.) But how does one start a blog? Let’s see if I can figure it out:

A TITLE

I’m currently reading Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns) by actual comedic goddess Mindy Kaling, and part of the introduction is titled “Alternate Titles For This Book”. I don’t think any of the titles listed were ever actually seriously considered (and frankly, who cares? They’re hilarious), but it reminded me of my burning hatred for titles. In my own writing, titles are my worst enemy. Never did I realise how important and relevant titles are supposed to be before I began studying creative writing at the university level.  Apparently titling a poem about your dead grandfather just his initials “doesn’t make sense organically”. Because that’s what I want to do after spending two hours writing a poem (well, an hour and half whining about how much I hate writing poetry, and thirty minutes writing the poem): spend more time thinking about how I can make the damn thing more organic with a title. Didn’t you know? Poetry is like an avocado. If it’s not organic, hipsters want nothing to with it. I digress. 

Page 7 of Mindy Kaling's Is Everyone Hanging Out Without Me? (And Other Concerns)

 I actually spent all of five minutes thinking of a title. I racked my brain for a play on words, part of a quote or song lyric or a clever rhyme with my name (for a sad, brief moment, I actually considered calling my blog “Jules’ Rules”. That’s basically on par with Blues Clues. I mean come on). Then my standard lack of caring about titles kicked in and I settled for “A Blog by Jules”. I am Jules, and this is my blog. Makes perfect sense to me.

SUBJECT MATTER (OR, THE HOOK)

Then came the next step: what to blog about? I am not an avid reader of blogs, but the two I read regularly are Oh She Glows and Zoella. The former is a health food blog by a self-taught vegan chef and the latter is written by an abnormally adorable English twenty-something year old with really great fashion sense and really big eyes. As much as I enjoy cooking and watching makeup tutorials on YouTube, I hardly feel qualified to write a blog about it. Granted, I’m sure neither Angela Liddon nor Zoe Sugg felt like experts when they first started out, and they’re now both international bestselling authors. 

I finally decided I don’t need a hook. I am actually super hilarious and charming in a very general sense, and therefore have no need to focus all that hilariousness and charm into one subject. Though I have a funny feeling there are gonna be a lot of posts about cats. 

AND NOW, WE WAIT FOR INSTANT INTERNET FAME

Because that’s obviously gonna happen. Isn’t that what the internet is for nowadays? 

I HAVE A FEELING I’M MOSTLY GONNA BLOG TO AVOID WRITING POETRY

That’s what’s gonna happen. I just know it. Though knowing my poetry teacher, avoiding writing by writing would actually be okay by her. As I stated earlier, I am Jules, and this is my blog. I’m really gonna try to keep things light, charming and insightful, and maybe just a hint snarky. I will definitely try to keep the bitching to a minimum, but I can make no promises.

Also cats. Definitely a lot of cats.